Consumers have no idea.....

I am a consumer....
i buy things for the sake of buying... not because i "need" it but because i want it.

But doesn't every girl do that?

Since i am studying full time and cannot work more than 15hrs per week i have had a long line of retail jobs to fill the "non-uni going days"...

The jobs that i've had are 90% retail and i have to say... being a consumer and dealing with consumers is a different ball game.

I'm sure sales assistants have laughed at stupid things that i've said after i've left the store.

The retail positions i've had have all been in high end fashion boutiques..... Maybe the richer you the smaller your brain i don't know but damn... some people are so... well... hmm... dumb....

Example. While working for a designer brand (won't name the brand but they are famous for their brown/tan monogram handbags) I've had hmm strange customers.

Scenario 1:
Customer 1: Is this leather?
Me: Yes it is
Customer 1: Is this a "blah (the designer's name)" bag?
ME: umm yes...
Me (thinking in my head): well.... u're standing in the HIS store OF COURSE IT"S his design! it's like standing in the Prada boutique and asking "Is this a Prada bag?" and the bag has PRADA written ALL OVER IT!

Scenario 2:
Customer 2 (girl asks her boyfriend): Baby i want to try this necklace on.. can you put it on me....
The Boyfriend: Sure

He then stands behind her with one end of the necklace in eachhand and FLIPS it over her head. The way you would flip a skipping rope if you were to jump over it. The sharp charm on the necklace STABS her in the eye....

Customer 2 (the girl): YOU IDIOT WHY DID YOU DO THAT
She's covering her eye with her hand and tears are slowing forming... she continues to verbally abuse him for a while and he just stands there not knowing what he did wrong.....

Scenario 4: The Call Centre.

Working in a recruitment call centre and taking calls from people who:
A: live in the country/outback
B: Want to work in a supermarket
C: have an IQ of next to nothing
D: Answer to an advertisment which states "no experience necessary"

Can be an interesting experience.

Let me tell you the process....
1. The applicant calls us.
2. We ask them a series of questions.
3. If they pass they move on to the next round which is a proper telephone interview.
4. We book in an interview time and day which is the most convenient for the applicant.
5. We tell the applicant to expect a CALL from the interviewer 30mins prior to and after the set time as other interviews done on that day maybe running early or late.
6. After we have booked them in for the telephone interview we give them a client number which is a reference number the need in case they need to call us back and re-book the telephone interview to another time.

ok... not so hard right??? WRONG!

All these people have to do is sit on their ass and WAIT for the interviewer to call them on the number they want to be called on.

Applicant 1:
Applicant 1 somehow found the headoffice of the suppermarket chain because he thought it was a face-to-face interview. He got there at the date and time of the TELEPHONE interview.

When he arrived at the head office he found that there was no one there (Because it after hours) this is what happened.....


Caller 1: Hi.. i am supposed ta have an interview at your office and no one is here. i've punched my number client number in the keypad on side of the door here and it won't open. (When he is refering to the "keypad on the side of the door" it is actually the security swipe keypad which has numbers on it which activates/deactivates the alarm system for the building).

Me: Sir... it's actually a telephone interview so you don't have to go and meet the interviewer he/she will call you. Is your interview booked in for today?

Applicant 1: yes

Me: what time was the interview?

Applicant 1: 6.30 (the time was 6.45)

Me: Which number did you give us to call you on?

Applicant 1: My house number

Me: well... the interviewer would have caller your house around 6.30.

Apllicant 1: SH**!! (Hangs up the phone probably running home)

Call Centre Situation 2:

Interview calls the applicant and asks if he has time to take the 20min phone interview. Applicant replies sure....

Mid way though the interview the interviewer hears a "loud fart sound" to which the applicant exclaimed "AHHH WHAT A RIPPER!"

Caller Centre Situation 3:

Interview calls the applicant.
Applicant's friend answers the phone the interviewer asks to speak to the applicant (lets call him Bob).
Bob's friend says QUOTE "Bob's being chased by the coppers (police) right now can he call you back?"

hmmm i'm sure Bob will get the job.


These are REAL situations! i'm not joking!

I think i've diverged from consumers to job applicants.. OOPS!

Back to the topic....

Working in expensive boutiques we deal with alot of hmmm.... "precious" people or people who think they're just MADE OF MONEY.... mind you i'm sure some of them are..... but usually the people who are MADE of MONEY who are driven to our store in a limo and are literally dripping in diamonds are the nicest and don't verbally boast about their wealth~

We've had one client who declared she was the 12th richest woman in Australia....???????? WHAT THE?

Another who stated quote "I have a large account balance, so much money in there i think i should spend some of it."


Others who demand we clean their jewellery because their friends pushed her into the pool with it on and now they are all dirty...
She wanted us to CLEAN IT FOR FREE! (We usually charge for that service per item and she had 6 pieces). it's not our fault she fell into the pool.

Due to our company's strict customer service policy i'm not permitted to kick these people in the butt....

But i wish i could.... damn....

Mix it up baby!

ok! I am not the most experienced drinker.... i drink the boring stufff.....

I've tried the following:

gin and tonic --> too dry
vodka lemon lime--> yum
vodka orange--> boring
Quick F#$%--> too strong
Johnny walker--> hate the stuff
a few sips of beer--> hate it more
tequilla--> my poison
tequilla sunrise--> too strong
midori lemonade--> sweettt
midori and milk--> tastes like ice cream
various chocolate cocktails--> yummm
various fruit cocktails--> prefer the chocolate...

hmm.... i've just looked back on my list of drinks....
and writing them all down makes me sound like an alchoholic....
hahahaha
please note... that all these drinks were not drunk at the same time... and/or on the same night.... well some were... but not all...

i'm meeting up with some friends tomorrow night for a few drinks
any recommendations....? keeping in mind i'm a girl and i don't like beer nor do i like anything on the "rocks" or any sort of food with "rocks".... might break some teeth... sorry bad joke...
ok.... moving on!

AHHHH i have that song from the movie "The Sweetest Thing" starring Cameron Diaz and Christina Applegate in my head... "do you like pina coladasss.. and walking in the rain" the one that they sing when they are half naked standing next to their car.... it's driving me mental....